I was riding the subte today and I saw a big poster advertising a book… I don’t remember the exact title, but it basically said “stop searching, find peace.” I haven’t read this book, so I don’t really know what it’s about, but the title prompted pondering.On one hand, they’re right. I identify with that statement: I find myself always thinking about the future, wondering about what’s next, dreaming, moving, wanting, waiting. I’ve got a busy head. I think about things (and obsess about things) and it keeps me mentally occupied (especially when I’m pondering life at 3am). I wouldn’t say it’s really “peaceful” inside my head. What if I really could stop searching? What if my head just stopped churning around and around and was quiet? That does sound kind of peaceful.
On the other hand, that also sounds suspiciously to me like an invitation to stop thinking and become stagnant. I think it can be easy to decide at some point that you simply accept your position in life, settle in and stop moving. That’s why people stay in dead-end jobs, boring towns, and bland relationships. They don’t have motivation to make changes. Life isn’t bad; it isn’t good. They’re peaceful. It just is.
I definitely believe there is value in being a peaceful person. It would be frightening if everyone’s head was full of the same thoughts as mine. I appreciate my calming, peaceful friends because I certainly need them.
However, I’m proud to be a searcher myself. I actually am grateful for my own discontent in many ways. It’s carried me to Argentina, it’s motivated me, it’s inspired me, and it keeps my head full of interesting things. It seems to me that depending on how you look at that particular characteristic, it can be either an incredible, motivating force or a difficult, frustrating feeling. For me, I’m grateful for my busy head (aside from those 3am moments) and I appreciate the thirst for improvement, the desire to discover, the search for meaning and interest.
I do hope to someday find a little place in the world and settle in. It would be nice to be more peaceful at some point, yet I don’t ever want to be complacent or stale. I never ever want to give up dreaming, thinking, pondering. To me those items are far too valuable, even if they cost me some sleep.
3 comments:
Nice pic!!
I completely, absolutely, and wholeheartedly agree with you, Amber.
I find that change is mostly good if you learn not to hang too tightly and see where the ride ("Life") takes you.
Look at how your wandering (or "searching?") spirit has taken you: many places, meet many new people, and maybe even made a few or several lifelong friendships because of some profound bonding moments.
When I saw that advertisement in BsAs, it seems funny that you and I thought of similar things...along the lines of settling...which I know I can never do...I have to follow my spirit.
To remind myself to always live Life to the fullest because you never know...you Plan, for sure, but the Unexpected may tip the scale, so you must always try and live as if it's your last day.
At times, it's difficult when you have that dead-end job...that's why you go find a new one...to find freedom in always striving for something better...
...I'm not talking about the Joneses, but better in terms of increasing your happiness within your own state of mind, to take joy in the most simplest of things like raindrops falling on your head or silver-white winters that melt into spring...(bursting in song here)...these are a few of my favorite things. :-D
Cheers, Sly :-D
Change is mostly good. And look... a year + later my searching spirit has taken me on yet another adventure. It's probably going to cost a few 3am nights, but I'm pretty sure it will be worth it.
Actually I think bursting into song is the perfect coping technique, lol! Life really is worth savoring.
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